Argumentation

Today I'm thinking of emigrating again
To another country, in some other part of the world
Or maybe there isn't one that would fit

Sometimes I argue and don't give up
If someone tells me I'm wrong when I know I'm right
then I don't give in, everybody knows that

This is Sweden. Everybody should agree
I wasn't mean of nasty, I just argued
What a terrible crime

Guess I don't have any authority
Maybe it's because I'm a woman
or because of my ways
I don't respect myself much
either.

I must practice pretending to listen
to not pay any attention
hide my feelings
and not care.

Stay cool and be happy.

My plan

My plan is to stay single for ever. I will enjoy not having to cook, not having to share, not having to compromise. I don't need to learn to play golf if I don't want to. I don't need to learn yoga if I don't feel like it. I don't need to be social to anybodies family who might not like me, isn't that something to envy?
I can do whatever I want. I don't need consider anyone else's wishes or plans. And I'm turning into an old woman, so soon I can travel anywhere I want without being afraid of being raped. Old women are invisible. Nobody has the right to tell me what to do or to criticize me. If anybody does, I don't need to care. An old woman can be how crazy or stupid as she wants. I don't need to ask anyone before I buy something. I can buy whatever I think I can afford. It's up to me.
I'm going to take that idea out of my head, that I will meet someone. I don't need anyone. This is my life. Others have theirs.

Only one sense

A big jasmine outside in the garden with flowers.
Can't feel any of the fragrance.
The same feeling as...
Never mind

Change

The bad situation in my life with all the worries suddenly changed. I'm grateful for that.
Now there just normal stuff to take care of. Just hard work and everyday things. For now. For today.

Carpet feeling

If people would ask you to lay flat on the floor and walk all over you, what would you think about it? Don't know about you but it gets me in the mood of fighting. Guess I have to win over that feeling. This is not the stone age.

Fear

The truth is
I'm afraid
Of the future
The darkest of tunnels
Might wait ahead
Not sure I will manage
But of course
Somehow
I have to
Besides
We are alone
Always
Aren't we?