It seems everybody is renovating their kitchen these days. Must be good times for the "kitchen industry". And the good times will remain. Because lot of people are making their kitchen black. I'm sure it feels cool when it's new, but who wants to live with a black interior for a long time? Who wants to move into a dark place?
My guess is that people will keep redoing their kitchens. Over and over again.
tisdag 12 april 2011
Funeral?
I've got this stupid question for years: Who will come to my funeral?
It's not interesting, is it? Not constructive. Not positive. Not meaningful.
I think I know where I got if from. When I was young one of my class mates died after some time of sickness. This young boy lived pretty close to me, and we had been attending the same classes since we were small kids. I think it was only he, me and another boy who had been in the same class from start until he died. There were lots of young people at his funeral. I knew all of this people and how little they knew this boy. People who hardly knew him cried a lot at his funeral. Since then my question has been "who will turn up at my funeral and pretend to be sorry".
Some time ago a colleague of mine died. I think he would have wanted me to join the funeral, in order to have a little group of people there who knew both him and his son, just to show his son that his dad had some friends. But I was told that the company was going to be represented by two managers, and I didn't manage to get in contact with his family to find out where it was, so I didn't attend. I think I should have.
I was attending an old mans funeral years ago, where the priest talked about him, using only the information he had got from his last "girl-friend" who had known him for the last 15 years or so. It felt terrible to see his closest relatives listen to a description of his good origin, his belongings and nothing at all about his interests in life. Don't think he would have cared, why do I?
Now I know. It will only be a few family members on mine. We are not much for parties in my family.
By the way, I'm not dying, as far as I know. Why think about funerals? Hope we don't have to think about funerals!
Live, live, live....
It's not interesting, is it? Not constructive. Not positive. Not meaningful.
I think I know where I got if from. When I was young one of my class mates died after some time of sickness. This young boy lived pretty close to me, and we had been attending the same classes since we were small kids. I think it was only he, me and another boy who had been in the same class from start until he died. There were lots of young people at his funeral. I knew all of this people and how little they knew this boy. People who hardly knew him cried a lot at his funeral. Since then my question has been "who will turn up at my funeral and pretend to be sorry".
Some time ago a colleague of mine died. I think he would have wanted me to join the funeral, in order to have a little group of people there who knew both him and his son, just to show his son that his dad had some friends. But I was told that the company was going to be represented by two managers, and I didn't manage to get in contact with his family to find out where it was, so I didn't attend. I think I should have.
I was attending an old mans funeral years ago, where the priest talked about him, using only the information he had got from his last "girl-friend" who had known him for the last 15 years or so. It felt terrible to see his closest relatives listen to a description of his good origin, his belongings and nothing at all about his interests in life. Don't think he would have cared, why do I?
Now I know. It will only be a few family members on mine. We are not much for parties in my family.
By the way, I'm not dying, as far as I know. Why think about funerals? Hope we don't have to think about funerals!
Live, live, live....
måndag 11 april 2011
On date; Swedish men are equal
In Sweden we are very equal. Both parents take care of the kids, both women and men do cook and we are of course fighting to get the some salary level as men. But it has some implications to the social life of men and women.
If you see a man standing with a door open in order to be polite, he isn't Swedish. Men do not hold up doors for women. There is a big difference when being abroad.
A smart advice: if you're heading for the movies, you can call up your date and ask her to book the tickets and pay for them online. You can always claim you have some problems with your broadband. That way you don't risk having to pay for her ticket.
If a Swedish man asks you out for date, don't expect him to pay. Even if he asks you out for a plain cup of coffee, you will have to pay for yourself. It's not about the money. A cup of coffee isn't expensive.
I tried to tell a man that he by not buying his date a cup of coffee he was clearly demonstrating that he wasn't generous. Not just when it comes to money.... I was trying to give him an advice for his future dating.
The answer was: I'm tired of paying for women. We are equal in this country and I'm very equal. How would I know if the woman only is interested in getting some free coffee?
I had no answer to that. I was glad I didn't spend more time or money on dating that guy. I could just imagine "it's your turn to turn off the lights","it's you turn to wash the car","it's your turn to send an SMS....
I've always made sure I pay for myself. It's just lately when I've been unemployed, it has occurred to me that Swedish men do not have any manners.
Or is it just because I've become middle aged? Shit, that's why....
By writing about things like this on my blog, nobody will dare to ask me out!
If you see a man standing with a door open in order to be polite, he isn't Swedish. Men do not hold up doors for women. There is a big difference when being abroad.
A smart advice: if you're heading for the movies, you can call up your date and ask her to book the tickets and pay for them online. You can always claim you have some problems with your broadband. That way you don't risk having to pay for her ticket.
If a Swedish man asks you out for date, don't expect him to pay. Even if he asks you out for a plain cup of coffee, you will have to pay for yourself. It's not about the money. A cup of coffee isn't expensive.
I tried to tell a man that he by not buying his date a cup of coffee he was clearly demonstrating that he wasn't generous. Not just when it comes to money.... I was trying to give him an advice for his future dating.
The answer was: I'm tired of paying for women. We are equal in this country and I'm very equal. How would I know if the woman only is interested in getting some free coffee?
I had no answer to that. I was glad I didn't spend more time or money on dating that guy. I could just imagine "it's your turn to turn off the lights","it's you turn to wash the car","it's your turn to send an SMS....
I've always made sure I pay for myself. It's just lately when I've been unemployed, it has occurred to me that Swedish men do not have any manners.
Or is it just because I've become middle aged? Shit, that's why....
By writing about things like this on my blog, nobody will dare to ask me out!
Too much
I write too much. I definitely think too much. I want too much.
How I know? I see it very clearly when others do the same thing.
"Speech is silver, silence is golden." That's easy to say!
How I know? I see it very clearly when others do the same thing.
"Speech is silver, silence is golden." That's easy to say!
About dating
First let's define the word. I define dating as getting to know individuals with the purpose of finding if you fall in love and possibly would become a happy couple. In my case it's all about sending a few mails, go out, having coffee together and chat on the phone. I know others who include having sex, but I define that as having an affair or having a relation, not dating!
Let's generalize. Singles aren't happy people who are enjoying life as you may think, I believe they are more like ghosts who can't get rest. Why they can't get rest and get settled? It varies. Sometimes, they got some heavy stuff in their baggage. Either their mum or dad have treated them badly, or other people were mean when they grew up. They claim "I can't find the right person", but in many cases it's more about finding themselves.
Well, of course it's also about matching. Most of the time, people have very high requirements. Online dating doesn't make it easier. They see beautiful pictures of all the "available" people. They believe the pictures show the truth and don't realize that it is like looking at ads for a house; the pictures might be taken from the best angle and the text might be wishful thinking, dreams or plain marketing. What they don't realize is that all these people are not for them. Everybody has to find someone who matches him. Everybody has to find someone who matches both when comes to brains and what the brain is filled of!
Men are very focused on bodies, mostly on women's bodies but sometimes also their own. The question is why. Didn't they find their last woman attractive, was that the issue? Or didn't the women they had like their bodies? If that's true, then everybody just have to become more focused on their looks! Sorry, but I don't believe that is the problem. It never was. But most people who wants to buy a new car, don't look for an ugly one. Wether it is because it makes them happy to have a nice car in the garage, to drive a nice car or if it just make themselves feel much better when people compliment them for their nice looking car, I don't know. A lot of nice looking cars are equipped with a powerful engine. However, it's not as simple when it comes to human beings, even if we tend to think in those terms. It's called the "halo effect", that we tend to believe that a person who has one skill also have another skill. For example we expect a nice looking person to be nicer than an ugly one. We expect a person who can express himself in writing also to be a person who is nice to talk to. We expect a person with nice manners also to have some intellect. We expect a person who is smart also to have some imagination. Just as examples. We fool ourselves!
I believe the problem is that we don't spend enough time together and that we don't care enough about each other. We get problems when we care more about our own needs than the needs of our mate, don't we? Rather focus on both needs...
We also want our lives to be perfect. Why not get a perfect woman to match your perfect home and your perfect car? Maybe because you aren't perfect yourself!
Let's just face it, nobody is perfect.
Let's generalize. Singles aren't happy people who are enjoying life as you may think, I believe they are more like ghosts who can't get rest. Why they can't get rest and get settled? It varies. Sometimes, they got some heavy stuff in their baggage. Either their mum or dad have treated them badly, or other people were mean when they grew up. They claim "I can't find the right person", but in many cases it's more about finding themselves.
Well, of course it's also about matching. Most of the time, people have very high requirements. Online dating doesn't make it easier. They see beautiful pictures of all the "available" people. They believe the pictures show the truth and don't realize that it is like looking at ads for a house; the pictures might be taken from the best angle and the text might be wishful thinking, dreams or plain marketing. What they don't realize is that all these people are not for them. Everybody has to find someone who matches him. Everybody has to find someone who matches both when comes to brains and what the brain is filled of!
Men are very focused on bodies, mostly on women's bodies but sometimes also their own. The question is why. Didn't they find their last woman attractive, was that the issue? Or didn't the women they had like their bodies? If that's true, then everybody just have to become more focused on their looks! Sorry, but I don't believe that is the problem. It never was. But most people who wants to buy a new car, don't look for an ugly one. Wether it is because it makes them happy to have a nice car in the garage, to drive a nice car or if it just make themselves feel much better when people compliment them for their nice looking car, I don't know. A lot of nice looking cars are equipped with a powerful engine. However, it's not as simple when it comes to human beings, even if we tend to think in those terms. It's called the "halo effect", that we tend to believe that a person who has one skill also have another skill. For example we expect a nice looking person to be nicer than an ugly one. We expect a person who can express himself in writing also to be a person who is nice to talk to. We expect a person with nice manners also to have some intellect. We expect a person who is smart also to have some imagination. Just as examples. We fool ourselves!
I believe the problem is that we don't spend enough time together and that we don't care enough about each other. We get problems when we care more about our own needs than the needs of our mate, don't we? Rather focus on both needs...
We also want our lives to be perfect. Why not get a perfect woman to match your perfect home and your perfect car? Maybe because you aren't perfect yourself!
Let's just face it, nobody is perfect.
fredag 8 april 2011
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