Being replaced by someone younger

It is tough finding out that the department that you had to leave when they wanted to save money, is looking to employ someone new, probably about 20 years younger than you.

A friend of mine said, it's like when the guy you are in love with tells you that he doesn't feel like having a steady relationship just now, but the next time you come across him he is already engaged, has bought a house and is expecting a baby with his fiancee.

I believe it's more like when your man leaves you because he tells you he needs to be alone and find his true self, but then he is seeing someone 20 years younger than you. No, it's actually completely different. The younger girlfriend doesn't need to know much about your man, but it's not the same thing with a job.

I believe it is better to have experience than to be young, when it comes to a qualified job. Who cares what I think, what matters is what the employers think.

A major personality change

I must be undergoing some personality change during this time of unemployment. OK, occasionally I've watched chefs cooking on TV during the years. Always impressed of how easy it looks, how organized they are and how little washing up they seem to do. When my son was little, he used to like to watch those shows, and he once he explained "they are teaching me how to cook". Wasn't that cute? The only thing I've learned is that if you prepare everything in advance and use nice bowls, cooking doesn't look messy at all but very tidy.

Yesterday I spent some time in a waiting room where they've got a TV. It was one of those "we've nothing to say, but we like to spend some time of yours" morning shows. If I would have been alone in the waiting room I would have switched channel, but there were plenty of people there, so I watched. There was this chef making a dish using a chicken. It looked pretty simple. Then I realized that I had a chicken in my fridge and I didn't have a plan what to do with it. What a coincidence!

In the afternoon I checked up the recipe on the web of how to make that chicken, and made it. I guess other people get inspired by TV cooking all the time. For me it was the first time!!!

Autumn song

This text is written by Tove Jansson. It is sang with a Finnish-Swedish accent, as it should...



The refrain goes something like this: Hurry dear, hurry to love. The days are getting darker minute by minute. Let's light our candles, it's close to the night. Soon is the flowering summer to an end.

It's a sad song, for old people. Some of Tove Janssons books for children are pretty sad too, or at least special.

Please save me from HR specialists...!

Years ago, there were lots of human resources, HR, in companies. They were interviewing job applicants, asking in depth questions on the applicants personality and background. Their mission in life was to prevent the wrong person from being employed. "No, that person doesn't have the right qualifications." "No, that person doesn't seem to have the right attitude and the right personality." "No, that person doesn't have the right background." "No, better not hire anyone from that company".

When the number of empty positions decreased and managers learned to hire people themselves or use recruitment firms, the HR departments were minimized. One of the qualifications needed then was for HR to know downsizing instead. To keep secret files of all individuals. Encouraging managers not to be soft, but to get rid of people they or someone else didn't like. Building organizations where certain people didn't have any roles, so they could become "redundant". Giving the redundant individuals the message that they would fit much better somewhere else. But in the end, they got the same message themselves.

Now the HR group have a golden market again. They now sell their services as coaching specialists. Their role is to coach people who lost their jobs to find new ones. Coaching specialists take a fat consultancy fee for their services. However, they are specialists on asking interview questions, like "what would your husband say about you if I asked him?" or "what education do your parents have?" or "are you planning to become pregnant?". They are not trained to be encouraging, but rather to see things from a negative perspective. Some of them even say: "if you don't fulfill the formal requirements for a job, don't apply for it", "you will never get that job", "people with your background are removed from the list of applicants by many of my HR colleagues", "the company you come from have a bad reputation". That's what they say while they sigh and make you understand what a hopeless case you are.

What's so upsetting with some wolves?

A lot of people are upset in Sweden. Because the government decided that wolfs should be hunted this year. So now people have shot a bunch of them. This makes a lot of people living in the cities upset.
I can understand if they are upset because (mostly) men want to behave like savages and hunt wild animals in the woods, but that's not the case. A lot of elks are shot every year in Sweden and nobody seems to be upset.
No, the reason seems to be the wolf as such. They claim it is because there are few wolves and the hunters are very many, but I don't believe that's the reason.
I believe it's because the wolves look like dogs on pictures. I'm happy if I don't have to meet any wolf in the woods. I think it's enough with all the dogs.

Censured

I'm surprised to hear that this blog is censured in certain countries. I've just been writing down my thoughts...
Isn't that scary? That people aren't allowed to spread their thoughts? Even in a blog that hardly anyone reads.

The devil in the boat?

There is a Swedish expression "if you have taken the devil in the boat, you have to row him ashore". I don't like the expression at all. It means something like "it's too late to go back, we must go through with it", but I always see a picture with a small boat, a big black devil at the back and me at the oars, forced to sit down and row.

I think about the expression (and the picture) when I'm stuck in a situation where I don't want to be with people I don't trust. I normally never manage to continue rowing as nothing has happened when something is wrong. With a feeling of having the devil on board. I typically end up in the cold water.....

You know what I mean? No? Never mind.

You can't, says who..?

People tell me I can't do things. "You can't do that", "you can't do this". Well, I know. Of course they are right. I've never taken the right courses or had the right training. What do I have the training to do, by the way..?

The trouble is that I believe I can do almost anything. At least until I've tried. And if I try, I usually think that if I just practiced a bit more, than I could do it better (please note, better might not even be good). The question is what to keep practicing on. What to focus on?

Then to the next trouble; I've always wanted to do things that I don't know how to do. Always. Unsolved problems. Impossible tasks. When the teacher at school told us that something was impossible, guess who went home and tried? Because I didn't believe it was impossible, of course. But that was long time ago. Now my kids tell me that I can't do things. My coach tells me I can't do things. I remember different people who have pointed at failures I've made.

It is not so strange to be scared every now and then, but it is definitely stupid to be scared of failing, since it prevents me from moving forward, getting anywhere and to do whatever "impossible" things that needs to be done.

Oh, a friend gave me a video with a great woman speaking, Kate Byron. You don't need to believe in your own thoughts, was the message. Question those stupid thoughts!

Tieing up all old wrinked women in bundles

I was going to buy a cream for my face today and asked for the type I usually wear. The woman in the shop asked me how old I was, and then stated that since we were in the same age, we should use the same kind of cream. I should definitely use a cream that removes wrinkles. She told me the cream I wanted to buy was for younger women.

I looked at the womans face. She looked like a raisin. I don't think I look like a raisin, at least not yet. I told her I didn't want her cream because I know it makes my face swollen. Any wrinkles are removed alright, but I rather have wrinkles than a swollen face. The woman started to argue. Of course she couldn't know that I'm perfectly happy with my skin just now.

Anyway, I didn't buy the cream she proposed. I still don't understand why we should use the same cream just because we are at the same age. We didn't have the same problems! When I was younger there were different creams for different kind of skins. Nowadays they just talk about age and wrinkles! I'm tied up in the same bundle as all the other aging women..

500 posts

I've written 500 posts on this blog (some of them were never published and some of them I've removed after publishing). Isn't that a waste of time..? Or is it a need to communicate and express myself?

I definitely need to get off Facebook this year. That is a total waste of time. It is like getting a glimpse of other peoples lives instead of living myself!

Sliding snow

The other day when the temperature suddenly was above the freezing-point and the snow started to melt, I got a surprise when stopping at a roundabout in Stockholm. I had not removed all the snow on the roof of the car since it started to snow a few weeks earlier, but I had left a strip of snow about 20-30 cm high in the middle where I've got some troubles to reach it.

Now when I stopped, a big lump of snow suddenly covered my windshield. I didn't see anything, and the wipers could coop at all with the ice and snow, so I had to run out of the car and remove the snow with my hands. The rest of the trip I was stopping very carefully...